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Madden Class-Action Lawsuit: It's About Time, But Where Was the Justice Department to Begin With?

Madden EA Football Class Action Screenshot Screen

The exclusive licenses EA signed in 2005 with the NFL, the NFL Players Association, the NCAA and the Arena Football League stifled competition and led consumers to be overcharged.  Hopefully any settlement we Madden buyers get isn't something like "$5 off your next purchase from EA." I don't want another EA game.

AMC's "The Killing" an Investment in the Banal

AMC The Killing TV Show Mireille Enos Joel Kinnaman Credit:Chris Large

Will AMC, in grand Don Draper fashion, rise to the occasion, or will a shit-storm of Walter-White-ian proportions strike?

Give Angry Birds the Bird

There's nothing wrong with Angry Birds. It's a well-designed, highly addictive game that is simple and intuitive enough to appeal to the masses. Bravo, Rovio. Golf clap.

Problem is, the Angry Birds machine is out of control, sucking limited consumer dollars away from other, equally deserving independent game developers. You want to know how the developers came up with the locale for their latest release, Angry Birds Rio? They all probably vacationed there during the cold Nordic winter. Rovio's gotten its millions -- it doesn't need any more.

I Am Motherfucking Sick of All These Motherfucking “Twilight” Clones in the Motherfucking Bookstore

Twilight Vampangel Sketch By S.K. Bentley

Full disclosure: I am over thirty and have read all of the Twilight books. And have seen all three movies, all on opening night. You might even say that I’m a Twihard.

Do I like the Twilight franchise? Sort of. I mean, I like them despite the quality of the writing, the plotting, the troublesome messages it sends to young women about creepy assholes, nonconsensual kissing, a man as guardian of a horny teenager’s virginity, and, oh, a guy oiling your window so it won’t squeak when he creeps in to watch you sleep at night. I mean, I like the books about as much as I can like a book involving a crazy half-vampire fetus that has to be chewed out of her mother’s uterus by the vampire babydaddy’s sharp vampire teeth (because in the vampire world of rock-paper-scissors, only vampire teeth cuts vampire amniotic sac and NO I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP).

No Pistols in SOCOM 4? Are You Kidding Me?

Socom 4 Screenshot

PlayStation’s SOCOM series has always stood out from the console shooter competition. The obvious reason is the third-person view. But more than that, the series has always stressed realism, tactics and strategy, which is why it puzzles me that Zipper Interactive decided to leave pistols out of its newest version of the game, SOCOM 4, for the PlayStation 3.

One World: Can Video Games and Television Coexist?

The Los Angeles Times reported yesterday that the Syfy network and Trion Games (Rift)are embarking on that grand quest to create a total artwork for the 21st century: A crossover television series and MMORPG, tentatively titled One World.  The big question is, will users invest in a new intellectual property just because it promises to be the universal world?

"The Roommate": An Unintentionally Hilarious Training-Bra for Horror Films

The Roommate, Property of Sony Pictures


Are you afraid of scary things? Roller coasters? The Saw franchise? And do you long to be brave enough to accompany your bad-ass friends on their thrills-and-chills adventures? If your answer to these questions is a timid, Cringer-not-Battlecat yes, then you need to have a plan of slow immersion into the land of terror, a multiple-step program desensitizing you to horror. You need a training bra for the horror experience.

Hollywood Officially Runs Out of Ideas


In grand WTF news, Deadline.com is reporting that Lionsgate has optioned pregnancy manual What to Expect When You’re Expecting.  Kirk Jones (Nanny McPhee) directs while Heather Hach (Freaky Friday) and Shauna Cross (Whip It!) co-write.  Aspiring screenwriters, take note!

SyFy Triggers Fatal Snark-Meter Overload

 

After a mixed year, blemished by the failures of Caprica and Stargate: Universe, but lifted by late releases Being Human and Face Off, Syfy (or is that SyFy? SYFY? God, why can’t they go back to just Sci-Fi…) has announced their largest original programming release in their history, including fourteen new kinda original shows and over 100 hours of TV movies, according to Deadline.

Google Art Project Turns Art Appreciation into Content Acquisition

Google Art Project Screenshot

With the release of Google Art Project, millions of people around the world will be able to take a virtual walk through museums they will never be able to set a real foot in.  They will do this while reading about Lindsey Lohan's court appearance and lamenting their disappointment with last night's Top Chef elimination to their Facebook friends.  The most treasured artifacts of our civilization will be consumed instead of appreciated, and the entire notion of artistic reverie will expire like an old version of iTunes.

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The Thought Cannon was created to provide an informative and entertaining source for news and opinion that will blow your mind. 

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